by Linda Silva
I recently visited the historic Pittock mansion in Portland, Oregon and was intrigued by its music room. I learned that back in the day, families “of means”--as the Pittocks eventually became after making their way across the Oregon trail as children –tended to make sure at least one, if not all, of their children learned to play an instrument. This was not to induce better math scores or plump up future college apps or even so they might one day grace a concert stage. The reason was much more straightforward: so the family could have some entertainment in the evenings. In 1914 recorded music was in its infancy and not destined to become a household product for several more decades. The only way to enjoy music was for someone to play it right in front of you. Imagine that: live music was the only music there was. So lots of people played it.
Since then society has somehow divided itself into music professionals and music fans. You are either a concert pianist or a pop star, or you download the music of concert pianists and pop stars and buy tickets to their concerts. Ordinary people no longer consider themselves essential music makers. Even those who play well often never play for others.
Which is why it’s so difficult to get our kids to practice. They don’t know what they’re practicing for. Sure, there may be the occasional recital around the corner, but what’s the overarching reason?
Recently two Musical Beginnings teachers gave a house concert, hosted at the home of a student with a nice piano and a large living room. It was an hour of lovely music in a casual, intimate setting. No traveling to a concert hall, parking, or paying a fortune for tickets. Just neighbors getting together to hearmusic from people gracious enough to share their talents. It made me want to go right home and learn a new piece. I imagine if such house concerts were an everyday thing, we would all go home and practice.
But in the absence of 20th-century music rooms and regularly-scheduled neighborhood concerts, how do we show our children it’s valuable for them to make music? Perhaps: by listening to them play. It might sound simple but in my talks with parents about the difficulties of getting their kids to practice, I find it’s rarely done. Even families that prioritize practice routines don’t always pay attention to what their music student is actually playing. So the message is sent that the study of music is just another homework assignment to be checked off the list.
However. The truth is that by tackling the study of music and taking on its years-long path to accomplishment, a person gives not only themselves but also those around them a great gift. They elevate life to something more charming than it otherwise would be. This is what we need to impart to our young musicians.
So…relax on the couch and listen to your child play through their pieces without checking your phone or rifling through the mail. Sit in on a lesson every now and then. Ask a question about a piece. Request that they play for you after dinner while you have coffee, or that they give the family a Sunday morning pajama concert. (And if you play too, by all means join in!) Bestow upon them the old-school attention due an artist—no screens, no interruptions, no talking. Leave corrections to practice time or to their teacher; during the concerts only praise and enjoy. Realize how each performance is a gift your childgives you and that your undivided, enthusiastic attention is your gift back to them.
Then watch how fast they learn.